FAMILY TIME

FAMILY TIME

If you are like me, you spend a great deal of time worrying about being a good parent, making sure you spend quality time with each of your kids, and giving/showing/having the appropriate amount of love for each (if you have more than one).  That said, when you have a son who has the same interests as you, it is a hell of a lot easier to grab a ball and glove, or toss around the pigskin, or hit the links, than it is to set up the teacups or pull out the rainbow loom.  But no one ever said being a parent was easy.

Parenting, as you all know, is hard work.  And oftentimes, parenting is a study in absenteeism.  We all struggle with the perfect (best/appropriate/acceptable) work-life balance.  Wouldn’t it be so much easier if you could just bring your kids to work with you?  All your problems would be solved (you think), and you would never feel bad about leaving early or coming home late – you would never miss a minute of time with your kid(s).  In short, all would be right with the world.

As anyone with an internet connection knows, gigabytes have already been written about Adam LaRoche and his decision to walk away from $13M with the White Sox because they asked him to reduce the amount of time his son, Drake, spends with the club.  After LaRoche issued a statement last week, there is now some discrepancy between whether the team asked him to “dial back” or eliminate Drake’s presence at the yard.  Adam clearly believes he had an agreement with the team wherein Drake could be there all the time, and he felt that the team simply reneged when Kenny Williams made this request/demand.  And, judging from the outpouring of support from LaRoche’s teammates, it doesn’t seem as if Drake, who, by all accounts is a great kid, caused any disruption to the team.

But putting all of that aside, and notwithstanding any handshake to the contrary, the White Sox – as the employer – do have the right to set the workplace rules.  And LaRoche – as the employee – has right to take his bat and go home.  Neither side is wrong.

As the closeness of Adam’s relationship with Drake got more and more coverage, I began to wonder about Adam’s relationship with his 12-year old daughter, Montana.  It is not for me (or you) to judge, and Montana may be perfectly happy and content spending time with her mom and away from her dad.  But Adam, by his own words, laments the situation.  Last year (coincidentally, around Father’s Day), Adam told the Chicago Tribune that “it’s unfortunate she can’t come [into the clubhouse]. That’s thousands of hours of time we missed together, and Drake and I get to spend it together.”

This is not to say that Adam doesn’t treat Montana fairly (even if not equally).  I just know the hell I would take from my wife – not to mention my daughters – if I spent six months with my son and not my daughters, and if there were “thousands of hours of time we missed together”.  I know how hard it was on the family when I was on the field coaching my son for 2-3 hours on a Saturday afternoon, or for whole weekends when we had travel-ball tournaments.  But, even in those instances, the girls normally came to the fields, and I was just on the other side of the fence; I saw what they were doing, and could slip them a finsky for the snack bar.  Being on a big league field, hanging out in a Major League clubhouse, doesn’t offer that kind of access for a player and/or his daughter(s).

And then, how do you explain to your daughter that your relationship with your son is worth $13M?  I am sure some mental health professional out there would say that at least part of that $13M would have been handy for therapy down the road.  But I digress.

At the end of the day, how Adam and Jennifer LaRoche raise their children is their choice, and our feelings on the matter stop at the end of our fingers (regardless of how much they may be waived or wagged).  And Adam’s decision to walk away from $13M was well within his rights (and, not to be said too loudly, much to the benefit of the Pale Hose).  And how Montana LaRoche deals with her father – not to mention her brother – is her concern.  All I know is what would and would not fly in my house.

So when I think of my relationships with my kids, and I think about Drake and Montana LaRoche, I couldn’t be happier that I have already planned a father-daughter trip with my girls this summer (to Chicago, natch).

PLAY BALL!!